What is confidence and how does it work? Confidence is a broad concept that can be explained in many ways. Searching through a dictionary you will soon come across 2 main directions. On the one hand it’s all about hoping it will work out well and on the other hand it’s about people. Is he/she reliable or unreliable.
When it comes to confidence that everything will turn out all right, there is often a fear or uncertainty underlying this. Will I or will I not be fired during the next reorganisation? If I get fired, will I find a new job at all. Your family and friends will usually say it’s going to be all right. And most of the time, it’s going to be okay. Look at yourself, how many times have you reassured a loved one with the words that you can have confidence it’s going to be all right.
Confidence is lacking because of fear
Do you have confidence in someone or not, there is often fear underlying this. That fear may have been taught to you during your upbringing. It can also be caused by an unpleasant experience. Situations where mistrust or not trusting someone often occur, are in work and relationships. Once an unpleasant experience with another person and your confidence has been violated. When confidence is broken, it isn’t quickly undone.
The 2 previous paragraphs have one thing in common. Often the cause of lack of confidence is nurtured from the outside. Do you get fired or not by the company during a reorganization. That is not up to you, but is determined for you. Whether or not you find a new job is partly not up to you. Of course, you have to apply for a job and do your best during a job interview. Only the other party will decide whether they consider you suitable and whether you fit in with the company. And the way you handle this uncertainty, is entirely up to you.
Behavior of others
Whether or not you trust someone is almost always caused by the behaviour of others. And whether or not that fear is justified is of course something else.
So the deeper meaning of confidence lies within yourself. You need to have confidence that you’ll find a new job. But also in your current job. Your manager can treat you in a certain way, but you decide how you deal with that. If you indicate that you don’t like it, the problem is often already solved to a large extent.
To understand this deeper meaning of confidence, a metaphor is often used. A bird is not afraid that the branch will break from the tree in which it sits. It has confidence that using its wings is enough to prevent it from falling to the ground. So if you have a nice resume, you know that the chance of a new job is much higher. In other words, your confidence is automatically much higher.
Confidence and fear are opposites
Fear and confidence are therefore often each other’s opposites. A lot of fear often means little confidence and vice versa. One of the most important things to keep trust is not to let your fear take over from you. Most fear comes from external sources. Think of newspapers, magazines, but also social media. In the 2nd World War, the German population was talked into fear of a single population group, the Jews.
However, the cause of all the problems wasn’t the Jewish population in Germany at all. Economic problems, however, were all attributed to the Jewish part of the German population. The rest is history. Millions of Jews lost their lives in the 2nd World War. Only because the German people had been frightened by the propaganda machine of the Nazis. A large part of the German people went completely along with it.
This fear hasn’t gone away
This same fear is still there. In today’s Western world, large population groups are confronted with fear. People would lose their jobs because of immigrant workers. So talking about fear is of all times. It’s up to you how to deal with it. Is your fear realistic at all? Do you know many people that have lost their jobs because of this? Are there people you really know, who have lost their job? How many of these people did you really talk to? So the point is not to give that fear any space. Alos for you, there is a job/place in society.
So far, this page has focused on major confidence issues, such as your relationship and your job. Confidence, or the lack of it, occurs at all levels. How many people are afraid to miss out on a bargain at a store? Consciously, or unconsciously. The marketing machine of many large companies responds skilfully to this. Only today you can get your favorite mobile phone with 20% discount. Do you have confidence in yourself that even without that new phone life can still be great?
It starts with tranquility
Confidence is also often lacking when there is no tranquility in you. Especially the deeper meaning of tranquility, tranquility in your head. Tranquillity is an important, if not the most important factor for developing confidence. Does a dramatic article in the newspaper about global warming in cause anxiety in you? If it causes unrest, there is almost certainly no confidence either. Isn’t this about trust whether global warming is true or not? It’s about the confidence that we as humanity can solve this. If everyone does his or her bit, we can deal with it perfectly well.
Self-confidence your path brings the right things
Confidence doesn’t mean the same as never having problems in your life again. The universe often brings things on your life path to learn from it. If you’re in a relationship where there’s more conflict then love, confidence is important. Confidence that you have the solution in your own hands. You can break up a relationship. However, it is very difficult to break up because you are afraid of the unknown, of loneliness, and so on. Sometimes you also have to trust that those annoying things will come your way to learn from them. By learning from it you also become stronger. It gives you a lot of life experience. Life experience for this life, but maybe also for the next life. The universe is working for you too.
The universe is a helping force
By the way, that doesn’t mean you can just sit back and leave everything to the universe. The universe is a helping force, but certainly not a driving force.
Think of it as a sailboat on the high seas. It’s up to you to decide the course and direction. The universe is the wind that gets you where you want to go. There is no point in worrying about the wind. You don’t decide how the wind blows. What you can do is be optimally prepared for the wind. The wind is going to come, always and everywhere. There are days when it’s not blowing, but there comes a time when the wind picks up again. At that moment you have to be optimally prepared. Your course and direction must have been mapped out by then. All you have to do is set sails and go. You will notice that if you are well prepared, the wind will be at the right angle for you more often.
Confidence in the universe
Confidence in the universe means that you have to take action yourself and that the universe makes sure that the right things come your way. You don’t know what real happiness is until you’ve been truly unhappy. You don’t know what a happy relationship is until you’ve been in an unhappy one. That’s why the universe brings that on your path. To finally make you truly realize what happiness is. If you understand and accept this, there is a healthy dose of confidence in you. In short, sometimes it seems that the universe only brings bad things and misery on your path. However, the question is whether it does. Trust that that little bit of misery is a prelude to success.
Confidence is also hidden in intuition. How often did you feel what the best choice was? All you were looking for, was confirmation from family and friends. Think of it as fear for doing the wrong thing. That first impulse or thought often leads to the right solution or choice. So often you know yourself that it is better to end your relationship or your job. However, there is still that fear that makes you look for confirmation.
Quitting is making space
Only when you stop that relationship, there is room for happiness with a new partner. But what it says here, doesn’t mean you should end your relationship right away. Maybe it’s better to start working on your relationship and try to solve all the problems. If that works out, it also feels like a victory. So it’s good to ask yourself what I should learn from this. What’s the best solution. You can trust that the universe, through your intuition, will give the right answers.
Try to avoid fear
If fear is an important barrier to building confidence, you’d better avoid it as much as possible. So make sure you also surround yourself with like-minded people. People who also want to build confidence. That does not mean that you can push the others away. Just make sure you don’t let yourself get dragged into their fear and drama. Stay calm, keep confidence and see that they’re looking for fear. They won’t even realize that they’re helping you to build more confidence. Because you’re going to recognize it and you’re not going to get carried away. Same goes for media. Make sure you don’t get carried away by sensationalist media that respond to fear.
That’s why it’s also a good exercise for your own confidence. Read a sensation article in the newspaper and don’t get carried away, but stay calm.
Also be apprehensive that things don’t work out at once. If something doesn’t work out, don’t become angry with yourself right away. The thought that you’re not a superman is already very comforting. If you try again the next day, it suddenly works out. Just like a baby who wants to learn to walk. The baby falls over hundreds of times, but it doesn’t get angry with itself. It has the confidence that one day it will learn to walk. Having the confidence that you can do something and that it will succeed is half the job.
Ask the universe for help
Confidence is the feeling in you that it’s all going to be okay. Even though these are not always the pleasant things in your life. Have faith that the universe has the right good things for you, too. The universe wants to give you everything, but only when you ask for it in the form of confidence. You will see that the universe will bring the right things to your path for you as well. Just have confidence in it.
So it doesn’t mean that nothing unpleasant can happen to you, but the way you deal with it is decisive. This applies to confidence, but also to the first cornerstone: tranquillity. If there is a sufficient basis for tranquility and confidence, you will see that strength will also develop within you.